jatuh toilet(total humiliation)

teringin nak kurus...haha

rasanya dah lebih sedekad aku tingin nak kurus.

mimpi je lah.

serius.

smlm jatuh toilet.arini lutut n ankle rasa sakit gla.
i think berat badan ni menambah kesakitan tuh.
went to the clininc yesterday...which i think kitaong ni mmg suka mmbazir duit p klinik.tujuan sbana nak scan tgk baby ok tak.tp doc tu plak xder scanner tuh n dia just kata alo xder bleeding then baby is ok.tp dia xpula nak tgk bila aku mangadu kaki sakit n rasa sore.
it swollen today n xtau la bila nak baik.haih....

kalo oang kurus, nak panggil suami angkat bila jatuh pon xsegan mcm aku smlm.tp tpaksa sbb adam pon tjatuh sekali kena langgar ngan ibu.dahla tgh nak cebok berak dia.

truth be told

rasanya...setelah 27 thn hidup ni, rasanya xder saper yg suka nak dengar ttg kebenaran.
kita xkan boleh terima dengan hati terbuka bila oang kata kita salah sbb kita rasa kita betul.kita xnak merenung n muhasabah diri sampai kita terima dengan yakin n kata pd diri kita ...

ye...memang aku salah n memang aku kena berubah.

payah.

bila tambah tua, tambah la payahnya.

kalo sesuatu benda tuh salah, pg la kemana pon ttp salah.kawan baik mcm mana pon kena juga bgtau kawan dia, benda tu salah.btambah2 tambah lagi kalo namanya BFF kan.kwn dunia akhirat.kalo dunia kita harap syurga, akhirat nak bawa ke neraka?kalo kwn menyokong awak buat salah, x ke maknanya mengajak dia ke neraka?

mmg oang lain xfaham masalah awak...awak je yg tau.kononya....
ader benda, xpyh guna otak yg genius pon nak paham.
baik...sy x secerdik n sepandai kamu.
tp sy tau nilai n tanggungjawab sy...

puasa yg belum disempurnakan

dah hari ke 13?!subhanallah....

rasa mcm baru smlm.xde terawih lg pon thn ni.ngaji pon xabih lg juzuk 1.dah hari ke 13?astagfirullah.

kelam kabutnya puasa sy thn ni.balik kejer melepek mcm budak baru belajar puasa.
masak untuk suami pon suma ala kadar ajer.pas buka kang, terus xlarat...xlarat nak buat apa pon.perut xsedap, rasa nak muntah melampau2.lemahnya semangat...huhu

betul2 rasa rugi...huhuuhuhu

morning sickness

masa mengandung adam dulu...i was with my parents n my husband livid in muar.so, i only need to manage myself and of course since dok ngan mak kan...leh la manja2.leh tdo, xyah tlg masak.
i couldnt stand the smell of everything and the fact dat this morning sickness thinggy started in the early days of fasting month..i find it hard to adjust.

skang ni tgh attend course 3 hari.balik kol 4.penat woh!smlm try ah masak, tp buat tahu sumbat jer, tu pon rasa cam nak duduk jer sepanjang masa sbb rasa nak pitam.abih masak, terus mandikan adam and muntah habis2 habisan.baru la rasa lega.

camner nak masak ni?naka beli kat luar, cost pula.kuih sebiji dah la 40sen.apatah lg baru 2 jenis lauk.seploh hinggit okeh.sehari seploh hinggt...30 hari?xder duit raya ah jwbnya kang.

maybe hari2 selepas kursus ni nanti akan lebih baik.uruskan kerenah anak dalam perut, anak yg tengah dalam fasa jelajah dunia,n masak n mengurus rumah at the same time betul2 buat sy rasa xcukup tgn.huhu....

anak ke 2

alhamdulillah...
im currently in my 8 week of second pregnancy.
so far, alhamdulillah....mabuk2 pon baru nak mula sbb agaknya weekend hari tuh lama sgt dok dlm keta dek kerana jam melampau di kl.

reaksi?

saya dan suami - alhamdulillah.rezeki Allah bagi kerana doc kata sy akan menghadapi kesukaran untuk mengandung lg memandangkan saya ni berat kan. iwas told the same with my 1st pregnancy.basically, we are happy.just dat...im not really sure how my husband react to the news.he smile and said alhmadulillah and dats it.

at first i was excited and i am still excited.tp...sy ni jenis yg amik kira apa oang ckp sgt jd rasa bedebo n bcampur baur pula bila oang bagi reaksi seperti "sy kalo boleh biarlah anak tuh jarak dulu" or "adam kan kecik lg"

jd...bimbang.salah ke?btambah bila oang tanya "xguna perancang kuarga ke?".FYI, doc advice sy utk merancang sndr kerana apa cara merancang selain kondom melibatkan hormon dan akan menambah berat sy yg dah sedia berat ni n yes, sy xkisah pon mengandung lg.

tp xpelah
yg penting Allah dah respon pd doa sy supaya beri sy peluang menyusukan anak lg.

doakan sy dpt melalui proses kehamilan kali ini dengan lebih baik n adam pon behave sepanjang 7 bulan kemudian ni.amin
p\=

exclusive breastfeed

exclusive breastfeed ni byk faedah.Allah dah sebut dlm al-quran n ramai saintis pon dah menyokong fakta itu.

tp...xpaham kenapa sesetgh ibu yg dapat breastfeed anak secara exclusive ni pandang ibu2 yg xberupaya dengan sebelah atau xder mata langsung!sangat sombong gaya percakapan hanya kerana dpt breastfeed.ye...alhamdulillah, mmg besar kurniaan Allah pd ibu2.tp...betul ker xder istilah xder susu ni?

n...sy juga cukup geram bila depa suka nak pendong lain macam bila kita kata kita bagi susu fm pd anak tanpa bertanya kisah dsebaliknya.masalah apa yg dihadapi?usaha apa yg dah diperbuat?

sy pon sedih jugak kalau ada ibu yg boleh bf anak sbb jenis senang nak generate susu ni tp dier xnak sbb sy cuma dpt peluang tuh 3 bulan jer.itu pon dengan susah payah sampai berdarah2 breast.

jd jgn prejudice...pls la.

more workload

last week...i went for a 3 days pedagogy course n the course contains of 3 phase.phase 1 which i had completed last week focus on listening and speakin, next week for reading n d first work of august = first week of fasting month is the third and last phase...which cover on writing.

now...to drive back and forth from jawi to kepala batas is already tiresome.it is a 45 minutes journey.and then, to sit down and involve in the course...is another.whats more tiring is to prepare a lesson plan (i got to prepare for a listening class)...implement it in class and prepare a report.a 300 words reflection with evidence (worksheet, picture etc)

monday is coming to its end, and for all u know it...its already friday!ok...i might be a lil dramatic there, but seriously, time flies n i still haven't come out with a lesson plan at all!

when i come back to school...the PK plak reminded me about english panel report of activities for semester 1 period, exam analysis n headcount.well...headcount is not a problem coz we(me and my fellow english teachers) just need to fill in the marks.but the post-mortem is hidious.argghhhh!

ONE STEP AT A TIME WON'T HELP ME THIS TIME!