Saturday, December 27, 2008


baba bought 7210 SUPERNOVA..huhu

and my leg hurts.but im filling healty.sgt2!juga happy...sgt2!

Friday, December 26, 2008

no sweat

i got a situation.

its been a week so im a little worry.maybe its nothing but im still worry.
i usually sweat a lot...walopon cuma naik tangga, atau dok dlm bilik yg tidak berkipas for 3 minutes.last wed and today when i went for a morning walk.i walk for about and hour n i did not sweat.panas tp xberpeluh...

balik umah...i did house chores for 2 hours, no sweat.

aghhh!its killing me

Thursday, December 25, 2008

holiday countdown

ah...thursday is almost over.
esok jumaat
kemudian sabtu n ahad (i MUST watch hana kimi!)
n here comes monday...meeting.

IM SO NOT READY!walopon dah beli stationary baru arinih.
aesha...saye dah beli cop yg kawai tuh.hehe...

Wednesday, December 24, 2008


today...i face d same problem as so bad at critical thinking and making decision.i always end up crying before making a decision dat i sometime regret in the end.

eg: 8.8.08 - on dis particular date my one n only bro is getting married and so does my best gave me a day off n i decided to go to anne's.i went ewan's nikah ceremony as i tot dats is the most touching moment rite?letting ur bro go.d next morning, everybody was asking me questions.y did i took a day off t go for a frens weding instead of my one and only bro?i started to feel guilty and berbelah bahagi bcoz i really wanna go to anne's wedding.after some time and some kata2 yg xsedap d dengar oleh some of my family member, i cried n decided to go to my bro's wedding.i hate dat.( i cried bcoz i have make a decision but easily back off because of others n i already prepared myself for d decision i made)

so...back to today's contemplating session.
we (me, my bro n wife n ema) went to tint our windows.decision has been made on sunday nite and i have counted my budget.bcoz, ewan said dat d least i shud spare is 250.ok...decision is gonna look cool!i was excited when wednesday come.dat is dis morning...
my bro call from the workshop dat i can get a gud tinted film with the least 250.ok...prepared.
when i reach d workshop, kak sue was watching her car done by the workers and all 6 windows cost her 450.this is where it begin...

i started to feel berbelah bahagi sbb 450 tuh!i cud buy a new hp n hantaran some more.i sit..take a deep breath n look at kak sue's car. dier baru amik semalam.hehe...
ewan was sudgesting dis n dat.i almost cry n baba keep asking to send him home.jd...sayer masuk keta n start d car.almost forfeit!im so 24 and im a teacher n i still have problems making decision for myself.aman is rite..sayer blom cukup matang.

so...did i do it?yes...with 350 for 6 windows.i choose a lighter colour.poor orange.sorry dear...but it looks good on u.n 4 of us tinted our cars.bengkel sibuk ari ni kerana kami.3 myvs n 1 viva.ema treated us with walls ice cream before going back.tauke geleng kepala sambil kata "wah..skang suma pon mkn ais krim"..hehe.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

tag bt aesha and zack..

1) do you think you're hot?

not at all!!

2) upload your favourite picture of you

3) what do you like that picture
its a picture of us
4) when was the last time u ate pizza?
ah..i remember dis was on 25 november.a treat to d family on my first salary day
5) the last song u listened to? bug.jonas brothers
6)what are u doing right now besides this?
watching tv
7)what name would u prefer besides yours?
more feminin izan i guess.hehe....but i like my name.seriously...
ppl i tag :
no tag sbb i bet all my friend in d list has been tag.


i just don understand y some people never learn from their mistake?
y do they bother to seek advise while they know how things will turn out?
or they never n just go against d world just to prove they r rite while they r obviously wrong?!

ps : do not let someone into ur life out of choices.

cuti is almost over

yes...cuti is almost over.dis is my last week to bersenang lenang sampai nak muntah di rumah.
last weekend went to kl with aman to see his mother.on our way...saw mawi and ekin nikah ceremony was live on tv, so i decided to listen to it on d radio.sempat la mendengar khutbah nikahnyer.made me nervous..hehe.

and im glad i have aman's mother as my future mother in far la kan...she bought me a gelang.yay..i know u were so jeles of me aman.sorry..ur mother loves me more than you.hehe.we also went to tempah baju melayu for aman.the already-made-sample baju melayu was so cantik.ader sulam yg sgt kemas dekat leher,kocek baju and lengan.aman yg xsuka pd benda remeh can2 pon tpikat kan?i manage to persue him to add the sulam things on his baju melayu.can't wait to see the result.

dats d end of our visit to jalan tar and masjid india.aman was to go back immidiately and im heading to serdang to anne's was worried to leave me and so he tag along to make sure i arrive safely at anne's house.thanx dear...if he wasn't there, i donno what wud happen.i got lost a few times, it was almost dark and my first time driving in kl.poor aman coz he has to take a taxi to go to biasa kan?xkisah kan?hehe...

today, orange dpt adik.hehe...2 lg.

p/s: caner duit bleh abih dgn cepat without us realizing it?!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008


arini rasa cam nak pitam..haih.
2 dugaan bila nak dpt sesuatu..when i badly want something, it will alway turn the other way around.ALLAH sedang menduga ALLAH juga sudah membuka jalan bg matter how hard it is...i refuse give up.but need to try really hard not to give up.huhu

few of neigbours been asking about tuition class.
what do u think?
how much shud i charge?
what shud i teach and how?

tp leh buat extra money skit kan.i really need it...there's a lot of things to buy!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

a week with orange

im home at last...dr selatan ke utara.sian orange....

sesampai di putrajaya...i went to alamanda and sight seeing around putrajaya on wednesday nite.sgt sis and cousin took d opportunity 2 look for part time was i who persuade them actually.i saw d advertiement at mcd..and they started to look for it at every pit stop.hehe...ingat lg masa keje kedai potostat ngan uncle.thanx uncle..sbb keje part time 2, dpt beli hp sendr.3310 was 4rat at dat time.arwah dah 3310 tuh.

the next day...brought my cousins to watch movies.i wanted to watch twilight but i have 2 under age with decided to watch cicakman 2..not bad.we adults decided to came back for twilight pas anta d twins home.hehe...asik kuar masuk parking jer cik orange eh.twilight SGT BEST!d hero sgt ensem...sgt cute..romantik..protective..bla..bla.sian kak long xdpt tgk..xper.leh tgk en.alyas lain kali eh.

on friday...bgerak ke perak plak.penat jugak sbnanyer.dok dlm keta jer kan.baba won't let me drive plak tuh.sampai umah mak long dah kol 12.a lil bit of catching up, drag us to 2 am.and we had walimatul urus to attend on xkisahla kan.baba missed his family too kan.d host was baba's cousin...d family he grew up in.rasa sgt asing sbb suma muka hindustan.cantik n hensem.hehe...they have 2 separate khemah for men and women.hanya lagu nasyid yg dpasang.sgt islamic...owh...photographer belah laki sgt adorable.bukan ensem eh...adorable.

back to putrajaya on alamanda lg.baba nak buat jamuan.ops...lupa sis dpt keje di a&, she'll be staying there insyaALLAH for the next 7 dis time..emosi sy xstabil.haih...mmg xleh dok umah oang sampai lebih dr 3 ari.HOMESICK!i miss my bed...bathroom and toilet, lagu washing machine, d stairs, d tv etc.

now...i love the scent of my room.a bit messy tp xkisahla feels good to be home.n i can't wait for sat to come.dah sbln xjumpa aman.we'll be going to KL.AGAIN!im enjoying every seconds of my hols.a bit worry though...i can't remember how to work nemore.teruk kan?!

hazim and hazirah

Monday, December 08, 2008

my raya haji

meet ain today..she keeps talking about her pregnancy and i get to touch her tummy.
rasa cam....ntah.xleh define perasaan masa pegang perut tu.listening to all her story on her pregnancy, its four months now...wa!sayer sgt takut to get pregnant.bukanla sampai xnak anak eh..just kesusahan dan kepayahan tuh makes me feels like giving up already.

mak kata i was born with my head was left inside for quite some time.sian mak...but i still can't stop hurting her.subhanallaj...if only i can tell her upfront about how sorry i am.

im bored...its raya n its raining.not heavily tp ujan renyai ni dah berlarutan selama 2 hari.baba is worried to leave the house bcoz dier takut banjir.dis rain is making me hungry tp xleh mkn bbyk so i really feel like eating stg sweet n tasty but i just donno what it is.arrrggggghhhhhhhh!

Sunday, December 07, 2008


it was a really bad day for me.xtau naper tp arini seems like i easily lose my temper.i quarell(salah ke eja)?? and yell at everybody.except baba..emmm

mak cried again.haih...
i yell at my sis coz she kept taking my belonging without my permission.

aman said maybe im not matured enuf.yer..word of d day, xmatang.

can someone tell me what mature actually is?
does it mean dat we r capable in making d right decision?
does it meant that we are ble to control our anger?


Friday, December 05, 2008

more blessing

ah...i just got one gud news.again..thank you Allah
d case has been discharge becoz d father failed to be present for hearing session.


its been a while since my last post..
i have so many things to say and i dont know where to start
or maybe i cud start by saying alhamdulillah for all HIS blessings and may it continues for d rest of my life.

1. gaji dah masuk n i have already save half of it for may 2009
2. beli almai baju sbb baba kata xperlu peti ais
3. orange is here...but i have no frens to wander around with me

ah...point to can one minute we love someone and suddenly hates him so much?!

Monday, November 24, 2008

field trip

just got back from first visit to the east coast of malaysia left me shud i put it - tired.senang citer la kan.

a long road to kelantan sampai sakit punggung.wonder how delly and izzah and others tahan naik bas selama itu.2 hours ride from melaka to segamat pon membingungan.dgn rasa penat, dgn harapan dpt berehat di chalet yg dijanjikan...we were actualy brought to a rumah tumpangan by the driver.i started swearing and again i just went words can describe my feelings.the toilet was outside n we had to shared a room with 7 others.bukanla kisah sgt pasal sharing tuh tp xselesa hostel...dgn toilet kotornyer!yacth!

so basically i had a bad start.from dat moment..mmg rasa nak balik jer tuk carik mangkuk tingkat gagal.rasa malas sgt..skang ni nak menaip ttg journey 2 hari yg rasa cam seminggu ni pon xlarat dah.


Friday, November 21, 2008


i read a fren's blog and she said if you r no longer in his featured frens list...then pls understand the message.

betul..i totally agree with donno bout you but i always lead myelf to denial.i sumtimes cannot help from thinking about how stupid i am 10 years back.i cannot let go of my past although i really want to.i somtimes cried myself to sleep thinking about people who betrayed me.who made me look like fools.but...maybe its not their fault.maybe im d kind of girl who put 100% trust on others but not myself.i long understand that frens come n go but true frens will always stay with you.

its really time to forget....because i know he already does.oh happy now just dat i hate to end a relationship or a frenship with so many question in my head.dis is not losing contact - i don tink he will make any attempt to reconnect with me.well...its for the better.ALLAH knows what is best for us.HE has answered my prayers once by granting me with blessing and happiness with aman.thank you ALLAH...

losing u means hurts but no scars....

bye bye

sok sayer nak pegi kelantan..yuhuu!insyaALLAH...nebes gak nak travel in dis monsoon season.ut its my first visit to kelantan so i hope Allah help me along the way...

can't wait for next week....

manusia slalu menunggu sesuatu..kan?

Sunday, November 16, 2008

im cold ^_^

me is currently in KUANTAN!well, it may not be big for you - dat refers to anybody reading dis.but it is big for me.dis is my first visit to Kuantan.i didn't have the time to wander around kuantan because dis is a sudden visit made by my sister for her CNI weekend was only about CNI.huhu...we made a decision to spend a nite here becoz its not safe to travel at night with only women in cars + one young girl.

salary is coming in soon.i have made plans to travel around - starting with first visit to kelantan with zai on 21st.alhamdulillah...ader rezeki nak bjalan.dulu, slalu berangan je bila la nak dpt pegi melancong on my own nih.

owh...about CNI, went to their 19th anniversary convention.watched people received prizes includes hadiah melancong ke bali and pakej umrah sponsored fully by CNI.agak best jugak kan.most of them are teachers.pendapatan cam best jer.ramai yg guna produk CNI PERSONALLY.meaning, depa xcarik pon customer.cuma carik partner tuk keluarga besar CNI.dats what tehy called themselves.kuarga besar CNI.Siap ader lagu tema lg.hehe...rasa silly giler watching my sis finished the song with actions.she look determined though.

i don like d idea at first.i only prepared for a 2 days one nite journey and then kuantan and next detination is home.xsangka plak nak kena overnite.sip baik hotel tepi sungai.nice view...
off to seize the moment in my dream.hope to complete my list before holiday end.yuhuuu!

Saturday, November 15, 2008

post NO 50 - dis is how my holiday started

last friday, we had teacher's so cemerkap, i can't help but to put myself in deeper tense.the police case's really affected my being at school.d guru besar gave lampoon statement about d case to me.saying how i was not ready to be d mother - yes, not to dat i was not the homerun teacher for year besar doesnt know pasal aku ni homerun teacher tuk tahun tiga.bukankah aku jemput dier menjamu nasik ayam di kelas?!my kids was really good.xpernah pon ader masalah.cukup2la dengan pandangan sinis dr gpk mengatakan dier pening memikirkan hal yg berlaku di sekolah n fobia tgk budak nakal...i cried inside.people saw me smiling without knowing how scared dis 4 monts old teacher.i was really devastated.pls people, i neva tot those kind of things is gonna happen.

in addition to the above pandangan serong statement kindda look, i've made one more mistake.haih...bad omen neva what to leave me just my girls is moving to a nearby school next year.she was one of the brightest in class.syg sekali...gpk telah berpesan bahawa aku perlu menyiapkan fail peribadinya untuk dier bawa ke sekolah baru.i define that instruction as complete the file and give it to her.and so i did...and plus another sarcastic look plus not talking to me.i was supposed to wait for the mother to come and pick it up and officially take her daughter out of the school.i feel like cursing and found no suitable words to define my feeling.subhanallah....sorry wan, i know i carried ur integrity but now its personal.cikgu, im nothing like my brother.he is a great teacher but im still learning and pls believe me i can do better if u just give me another chance. year, im gonna teach year 1 and 2 and that is 4 classes in total.alhamdulillah.

im off to shah alam accompanying my sis for her CNI meeting.i was mentally tired.we were lost last nite.after 30 min wandering around glan marie, i pretending dat i was sleeping.i hate the tense and impatient.better doze off rite?half and hour later, we end at tesco with my sis's fren calling for his fren.hey!naer xcall earlier?i stayed in the car for one hour waiting the meeting to end.mind you,it was 12 am.and he brought us to a mamak stall talking more with his fren about CNI.aku xminat la weh.xpyhla nak persuade.aku buat muka stress.n bagi stress tempat keje as the sambung plak promote product lain.haih...kol 3 baru sampai umah.flat..

not a gud way to start d holiday that we have been waiting for kan?i know all dugaan n hikmah is one of the way for ALLAH to show HIS love for us.everyday we preech kita serahkan hidup dan mati kita pada NYA,and dis is small kan.ALLAH xkan uji kita kalo DIA tau kita xmampu.i know i really need to be strong and more focus at work.saat ni buat aku teringat pasal mdm.low.we need to double check on anything, everything.take everything down.even a short be a teacher is not easy especially when ur superior has lost the trust.i believe dis is temporary.with all your support and doa, INSYA-ALLAH, i can get through dis.thank you all.

p/s - aku tengok sjak kematian and it really catched me.sangat sakit.terkesan...byk yg perlu kita buat tp berkesempatan kah kita?kalau esok tibanya ajal?kwn2, marilah kita bersedia menghadapi peperiksaan agung di alam barzakh.dan semoga kita selamat di dunia n akhirat.

Thursday, November 13, 2008


last monday, a boy fell in class ad injured himslef.teacher on duty brought him to the clinic and he received 3 stitches for the minor injuri.when d father was told about the incident, he threatened the school dat he would make a police report and sue the school.

i was grinning and smiling at at school dat day because it was my 24th was supposed to be the most happiest day of my 2008.i celebrated my birthday with the teachers and my headmistress and also held a year end class gathering.little dat i noe dat it was the worst day of all.

the boy fell 5 minutes before my class i busy attending my class gathering, and other pupils were attending the hari anugerah rehersal. d father insist dat it was the teacher's fault - in this case it was MY fault.haih...why did he choose 10 n0vember - 845 am to pay tolak2 with his fren?

i was so shock as the bg said dat i shud be responsible when the father made the police report.teachers call and asked question, help me to create excuses and advice.thank you..
now, everywhere i go, d gpk will ask y am i not in class and i shud be in class monitoring the kids pdhal it is my free time.stress.dr police report n dr kesannya.ditekan dr setiap sudut.

im asking for ur support and doa..may everything stop just here.police said it was not dat serious and they have done their part.i really hope dat the father stop thinking about sueing the school and i can continue may day at school like any other days.

Thursday, November 06, 2008

count down

arini kamis
esok jumaat
kemudian sabtu

Monday, November 03, 2008

Duit plastic

its november.a lot of things is happening in dis november..most important thing,salary is going to be in!
ha...gaji belom masuk ader plak suh apply credit card la, personal loan la.hehe...ntahla.duit sgt berharga to me now.ini pon wish list still xdpt dpenuhi.ader yg perlu dpotong atau mungkin hanya akan dtangguhkan..

Sunday, November 02, 2008

wake up call

i received a call from my collegue asking me where i am.i was so surprise!she sounded like mak tam on d fon.hehe...sorry kak mona.i only recognize her when she said she's having the PSS at her house today and im invited.hehe...we are neighbours.not next-to-me neigbour but around-the-hood kind of neighbour.
dis call has made me thinkin bout early on sunday morning!i know...
but actually, im thinkin about how i love my job.yes, the kids are quite tough to handle but im getting ok with.they wave at me when they saw my father came to pick me up.say bye teacher.look at the watch and say good afternoon teacher.blushing when i saw them helping their parents at pasar mlm or paddling around the kampung.dats great isn't it?they did stg bad at you in class, but they get neutral when they are outside.baba kata mungkin dalam kelas dier takut ke? maybe...sayer tak garang pn sbb sumtimes 1s 2 just never listen.ko tengking la, siap ugut ngan rotan.siap cubit 2 3 budak just to show how serious i am pon dier buat bodoh jer.
teachers?my collegues work hard and play hard.they do their job seriously and hope u-as a new teacher to do better.kalo x, the magic word will be uttered ko cikgu baru.jangan amik cuti byk sgt.belum confirm lg.tanda ktas jangan sambil lewa.bla...bla..bla.byk nasihat and they love to be synical too.i've been warn by kak binah dat one mistake u make here will cost u maybe a year of synical conversation.but you r never left behind.4 monts ago, when i came in...the gpk HEM knew my brother.she always come to me and said patutla awak ader muka cam kacuk2 sikit.adik cikgu redhuan rupanya.awk ni apa?arab eh? and she ponder these tot and question while picit memicit my whole body.she huged me before she left.the teacher's room was never left with silent. there are always people talking, laughing and discussing and THERE ARE ALWAYS FOOD ON THE TABLE!kak binah keep reminding me dat im on the diet everytime she saw me sitting at the corner.hehe...thanks kak binah.
yes, school is great.i basically knew now how every teacher n pupils shud be approach.yes, sekolah ni mmg ramai budak pemulihan.and they need attention.and i need to figure just how i need to overcome their lazyness to school.mungkin dia ingat dia dah tau suma.despite the kerani (dier suka dtg suka dgn mood swing yg xmenentu and throw it at the teacher)...everything is alhamdulillah.just a normal school and holiday is coming and im all excited.2 more weeks to go and i hope i can still continue to teach the level one pupils.

Saturday, November 01, 2008


being a homerun teacher for year3 class has made me helpless.exam week has over and now teachers are busy with marks.i've got all the marks for all subjects for my class.i was here and there chasing for marks, looking for other teacher for their class's marks and things were getting better or shud i put in 'better'. we need to collect nilam data from july until november.actually, the teacher has told me week before and i have already checked my pupils' entries.surprise...surprise!there were only 8-on the average- entries only.come to worst, dats is only for august and november.yes...the entries started on august.there were also some with no record at all!what am i to write?being smart...i adjusted the number to 2 entries each monts.huhu....

yes, dis week is all about numbers.i know closing the register is not that complicated.not to me class was separated on early, we have 2 register -obviously.whats complicated about this is, it was done 4 months before the school end and the number from thousand has decreased to hundreds.x logik kan!then the PAR bgtau kena tutup bulan 9.ignored august.ok....i took my calculator and start counting.well...the reason i did not pursued with account was numbers.too many to add.u need to make sure that the number in row one is telly with number in column one.which...i sould find because jumlah dr bulan lepas xder.i was doing dis at year 1s class's and i ignored them totally.
1. teacher...boleh lukis?
yes...u may.
2.teacher...tgk nizam, dia xmintak izin
3. teacher...may i go to the to toilet?
haih...yes u may.i don have time to correct u.

aesha, remember ADAB?i have tons of those on my table.huhu....
next tuesday, there will be a public speaking competition between PPSMI teachers.i had prepared a simple speach for our representative as im gonna be the guru pengiring and i also got a job for my mom.she is going to cater the food for the day.alhamdulillah...ader jugak rezeki.
since mak benti niaga, dapur yg kecik tuh never stop working.thank you ALLAH..sementara xder gaji ni kan, tu je la yg dpt tolong.

Monday, October 27, 2008

only human

On the opposite coast of sadness is something called a smile
But before we can go there, is there something we're waiting for?
In order to chase our dreams, we can't have a reason to run away
We've got to go, to that far away summer's day
If we find it tomorrow, we can't sigh
Because like a boat that opposes the stream we have to walk straight on
In a place worn down by sadness something called a miracle is waiting
Yet we are still searching for the sunflower that grows at the end of spring
The warrior who awaits the morning light before he can clasp it with red nails,
his tears glitter and fall

Even if we've grown used to loneliness
only relying on the light of the moon
We have to fly away with featherless wing just go forward, just a little further
As the rainclouds break the wet streets sparkling
Although it brings only darkness
A powerful, powerful light helps push us to walk on

Sunday, October 26, 2008

wonderful gloomy day

how can gloomy day be wonderful...well becoz im on a road trip to Rompin dis morning n before we head our way, i read an article on mastika.its about how world is being unfair to fat people just because we r fat n not really catch me...not touches me.but caught me in deep tot about myself.lately i was distracted with dates.days gone by n not dat i don like delightful n anxious but at the same time worried.all bride are beautiful n i wonder will i be d same?d beautiful bride that capture all the guest's eyes?!i don tink so....aman always reminded me of the word redha n thankful.not dat im not but sumtimes i just want to be part of the world.he also said dat we determined our own happiness not others but i always tot dat how can i be happy when people is treating me like fatness is a disease?well...come to tink of it, im ok.alhamdulillah...i don have dat much problem with my health juat because im not in the shape.juat pray for the best...

n what is wonderful about today is, i was doing all dis tot when i was on the road heading to tg gemok rompin to meet my dear fren cheno - on her day and ona!arrghhhh!i miss much!its been so long since i last talk to them...

n i dedicated dis post to ceno...congrats dear.i know you can be a good wife one day.but please....choose other date than 1st may.u might miss my wedding.u have missed my engagement remember?!its gud to see u n ona share the laugh and bad jokes again.hehe

here some pictures to share the joy with others n ceno...

ona n ceno

ceno herself

im mad!

i can't sleep n i hate myself so much at the moment


Saturday, October 25, 2008


naper asik salah taip?cemerkap makes me hate myself....

im sorry kids..

i have finish marking d exam papers for all classes...
i donno if what i did is wrong...dat is marking according to he scheme as all the teacher said dat only i can save my pupils from can i help them if they wrote nonsense on the paper?!its obvious...i2 pon aku kasik sau pada budah dajah satu yg salin semula clue words for note expension tuh.but...still not gud enuf.they don understand a word.have i failed?i don tink so...

but fotunately, year 3 pupils did beyond my expectation.half of the class manage to write good an meaningfull sentences.god job dear!

i hope my year 1 pupils will developed their interest in learning n i really hope dat i can be a better teacher too.after reading fauzan's post on how learning was supposed to be fun, i can help bu to i dat kind of teacher?a teacher who makes learning as fun as main ting ting or congkak or such....sigh!

Friday, October 24, 2008

tag by Fauzan

1.How old are you?
~ i'm 24

2. Are you single?
~ happily engaged...thank you.

3. In what age do you think you’ll get married?
~ i hope n pray its gonna be 25.not more than dat pls

4. Do you think you’ll be marrying the person you are with now??
~ insyaAllah. with all blessings

5. If not, who do you want to marry?
~ no idea

6. Do you want a garden/beach wedding, or the traditional wedding?
~ traditional + garden.haha..berangan.

7. Your ideal motif?
~ green i think..or gray wirh some black lace...or soft brown.maybe...

8. Where do you plan to go on a honeymoon?
~emmm.....tempat yg ada pantai.kalo dpt g zoo taiping je pon ok kot.haha!

9. How many guests do you think you’ll invite?
~emm...don have dat much frens.people barely know me.i donno..little.dats all i can say.
10. Do you want an extravagant wedding or a simple wedding?
~ simple one will do

11. Do you want the traditional vows or something you’d make up on your own??
~ emm....
12. How many layers of cake do you want to have?
~ 2 layer of ice-cream chocolate n vanilla cake

13. Do you prefer having your reception at a hotel or at a simple place?
~ kat umah l abest..meriah.

14. When do you want to get married, evening or morning?
~ get married? evening..

15. You’d rather have your reception outdoors or indoors?
~ outdoors indeed

16. Do you like a grand entrance for your groom?
~ need la.hehe
18. Name the song/tune you’d like played at your wedding??
~ ntah...

20. Do you want a solemn ceremony or a light one?
~ light.

21. What age do you want to get married?
~ dah jwb kan?

22. Describe your ideal husband/wife
~ someone like him...sgt penyabar...n tenang

23. Do you prefer fine dining or just the normal spoon & fork/knife?
~ mkn pakai tgn pon bole...
24. champagne or red wine?
~none of the above

25. Honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding?
~ days afte...

26. Money or household item?
~ both..hehe

27. Who will pay for the bills?
~ us la....saper lg?

28. Are you ready for married life?
~ guess so

29. Do u think you will still be a virgin until u get married?
~ definately a yes...

30. Will u always be true to your wife/husband
~ insyaALLAH...I will

31. How many kids do u like?
~ 3-5
32. A new house for a newly wed or an old one?
~ baru la...

33. Will u celebrate silver wedding, gold wedding, or diamond wedding?
~ emm...

34. What kind of cuisine would u like for ur wedding?~
what define kenduri kawin kinds of food

35. Will u record ur honeymoon in a cd or dvd?
~ just picture

36.. Whose wedding plans would you like to know next???
Choose 6 person.
~ aesha
~ huda
~ zack
~ dida

pls dead cat...go away!

dis happen yesterday...i have no time to post it earlier.

started my daily routine as usual yesterday.we left the house at 645 to SK Kampong Tengah.i was at the back seat, deep in tots when baba suddenly slow down said...oppps, xsempat.i tot it was the traffic lite n suddenly i heard a sounded like a car hit a papan n it breked.i looked out of the window n saw a cat!tergulung mcm tenggiling n it looked painful!sgt sakit...sgt sgt sakit!yg lebih menyayat hati ialah kucing tu mcm can i say dis ekh?ttgh...menggelitik.sort of.dgn keadaan dier yg bergulung mcm tenggiling, i felt like crying n i almost cry of d tots dat maybe dia patah tulang belakang n went bergulung.argh!sakit!

n i could not let it out of me yesterday n today.n i guess d cat will stay for d week...sakitnyer!

dear sorry i could not safe u n i know baba tried.may you be in peace.

Monday, October 20, 2008


exam is tiring...yes!aku siap bwk buku cita tp xder masa tuk baca buku langsung.

1st paper - b.melayu
salin semula pon xdpt?haih...dats d fact.they spell klinik like dis - KELENEK!SUBHANALLAH...itu soklan bm yer.belum lagi bi.bleh la buat ayat mereka bermain guli menggunakan congkak!pening..

2nd paper - matematik
worst!budak dajah satu tanya macam mana nak buat dr soklan 1 sampai 20!they don read d q langsung.yes...d q is in english!total dajah satu kan...budak2 baru kuar pemulihan plak tuh.lg la..caner nak jwb soklan bi nih!16 - 7 pon dier jwb sunday, monday etc.huih!

in a nutshell...mmg xdpt la depa jwb note expension aku nanti

Friday, October 17, 2008


baba bought a bicycle 2 years ago.i brought it to UIA when i was there n never been used ever since.its kinda bored being at home just watching tv aite?i borrowed pam basikal from the neighbour and start pumping the tyre...fuuuhhh!sweating already.

took a cycle around the neighbourhood....i love the were playing, birds were flying.xtau nak define tp i had a great evening.sgt nyaman n aman.

mak was next door.visiting our is only about my neighbour.she was a teacher.its almost a year now- she was diagnosed with cancer early not sure what kind of cancer.last ramadhan....mak cooked for her - sometimes la.when she's craving for stg. yesterday, the doc told her dat kemoterapi is useless now.she had been to kemo for quite some time now n pakar at pantai had refer her case to the general hospital juat to hear dat time is up for her.there is nothing dat anybody can do...subhanallah.

im so thankful dat i can still feel the breeze of the air n listen to the birds chirpping on the air.
i hope dat we can all pray for her, to enlighten her burden, so dat she wont suffer dat much.


dis is a point to ponder...for anybody who read dis, bleh ke soklan note expension dkeluarkan untuk pelajar2 tahap satu?sila beri komen anda!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008


tagged by aesha...nebes!hehe...

Every question is referring to 1 person.
En. Kamal

1. What is the relationship of you and him?
love of his life ...hehe.i hope so

2. Your 5 impressions towards him.
baik hati
tp sgt pendiam
always know what to do

3. The most memorable things he had done for you.
most eh....anta rombongan meminang kot.huuuu

4. The most memorable things he have said to you?
he does not want to loose me...

5. If he becomes your lover, you will...
love and treasure him

6. If he becomes your enemy, you will...
just forget about him i guess

7. If he becomes your lover, he has to improve on...
maybe he needs to be more mature sometimes.sbb dier suka tonton kartun n sometimes he just got carried away.pls eh abg...i love cartoon too tough

8. If he becomes your enemy, the reason is...
he choose to be with someone else

9. The most desirable thing to do on him is?
define desirable...hehe.

10The overall impression of him is...
he is a life saver...a soulmate

11. How do you think the people around you will feel about you?
isn't dis suppose to be bout dat person u choose to talk about? do people feel about me?frankly, i always tot they are not comfortable being around no joker..i love to talk - empty talk dat not beauty with brain...xsistematik n d list goes.

12. The character of you for yourself is?
im a talking to myself...easily got panic...but i always give my very best

13. On contrary, the character you hate of yourself is?
sila rujuk soalan 13

14. The most ideal person that you wanna be is?
i can only think of myself as izan azahirah

15. For the people who care about and likes you, say something about them.
thanks for u concern n i like u too

16. Ten people to tag:
i don have any name thus dis is it eh...


what is it about people with title?

one of my pupils was absent for 7 of her friend said maybe she was sick but he saw her palying around their neighbourhood joyfully.well...i guess maybe sick was just is her seventh day off and i ask the HEM shud i issue anything because non of her parents or family member - she has a bro in year 4, come to see me to explain her being and the HEM said, yes. issue warnng letter.

i went to see the guru besar for her signature...punggah fail dlm almari to file the school copy and suddenly HEM called me and said we have to cancel the letter because she was the YDP of the PTA's daughter.and the HEM said dis has happen several time.

whay don't they take any action just because she was somebody's daughter (anak pengerusi PIBG jer pon - kalo anak datuk ntah caner ah) n d fact that she has been doing it several time?


Monday, October 13, 2008


so what if aku xtau nama KPPM?!its not like i cannot be a gud teacher kalo aku xkenal dier...i can still carry the national vision n mision.dis is the scenery...

i was so fresh up stomach is aching.i donno if it is gastric or lapa...i cannot sleep coz its raining outside n i love rain!so..i started reading john grisham.need to finish reading it by tomorrow so i could return it to ain.while i was sister got back to pick up baba and made their move to kuala kangsar.i managed to catch her n ask for her wireless port.

i was browsing the net n decided to talk to few stranger.just a plain talk.everybody start asking x bosan ke dok umah xkejer.ok...i told them i work from 7 to 2 5 days a week.ttba...ader one kerek guy asking me about how does it feel bout being a teacher.FYI...masa ni lom start kerek lg.

soklan ni yg adala permulaan kekerekan dier..
awk kenal x KPPM?
so i was...kppm?aper tuh?kpm saye tau la.
ish...xkanla dah 3 bulan kejer cikgu awk xtau nama ketua pengarah apa ntah malaysia.pttnyer masa awk blaja awk dah tau dah.
aku pon dgn naive reply....kan.xptt kan keje tanpa tau saper oang atasan...hehe.
dier jwb....xptt!
so i ask...awk kejer mana? (he seems to be well verse pasal our salary rate - DG41 n temuduga n all the acronim)
kan sayer dah kater...awk xkenal saper kppm?
owh..kalo sayer xkenal saper kppm awk xleh jwb ah soklan sayer?awk ni saper?anak dier?anak sedara dier?atau anak sepu dier?2 pupu?
dier jwb...kalo sayer ckp pon awk xkan percaya.sayer dah amik IP address awk n rekod.

eh...dier ingat aku takut!hanya kerana aku xtau nama KPPM!


i am soooo happy during weekends dats i wish monday will never come!hehe...

aman was here for raya visit and i finally have the opportunity to introduced him to my dearly frens. mak was busy with orders - alhamdulillah, walopon dah benti meniaga, ramai jugak oang dtg umah untuk tempahan makanan.especially for raya ni kan...maybe mak could think of opening a catering for minor jamuan and cook at home with minor complaints tough - our dapur is smaller than before.

can't wait for more great weekend!4 more weeks till school holidays!

owh...did u guys watch ayat2 cinta on tv3 last friday?i texted yana n ceno and they said its totally different from the book n dat made me feel like buying the still teached me something.

1. poligami
its a well known fact that poligamy is not easy.adil n mampu bukan dukur dgn material ajer.mampu ker nak kongsi cinta n perasaan?walopon d first wife kata dier sanggup bermadu for the sake of the husband (in this story - to safe the husband from being sentenced to death) tp mesti ada rasa sedih bila tpaksa berkongsi.

2. jodoh
we always wish and pray dat Allah will grant us with a good dat always obey His order - semayang 5 waktu, hormat orang tua, hormat diri kita etc - a man dat can guide us on the right path.i bet all of you are familiar with LELAKI YANG BAIK UNTUK WANITA YANG BAIK AND VICE VERSA. dis is for u n me, untuk dpt jodoh yg baik perlula kita menilai diri.baik kah kita?n dats when redha came.bila kita telah dpertemukan dgn jodoh kita...terima la baik buruk dier instead of complaining n wish dier jadik org lain.

a reminder for me n you...

Wednesday, October 08, 2008


its been dys since my last is monotanous nowadays.need more polyphonic tone.hehe...

last onday, i went to 1S...i ask the usual question.

me : ok class, what day is today?
pupils: monday!
me: can u spell monday for me?
pupils:M A N - MAN D A Y- DAY....MANDAY!
me: no,its monday - MONDAY!
amarul aiman:bukanla teacher kan manday, mestilah MAN bukan mon! to explain?au terus ignore dier n continue my lesson.hehe...

when for my frens open house - SHE'S PREGNANT!more anak buah coming.she's like a sister to me and im happy for her.congrats eh ain!mesti anak ko comel like u n husband.

we'r all back to work n there's only me n mak n baba at home.did i mention they has stop their business?yeah..n there's basically nothig that they can do at home.i don noe..maybe out of boredom n tense, mak keeps staring at me definition kind of look and commented everything that i do.i know...deep in her heart how she wish iam the black sheep.she keeps mentioning dat she was always woried about me going to kl rather than mak...i will never do something that will hurt u n baba.altough u barely called me when i was away...u guys are still close to my heart. i hate myself whenever we ended up quarelling over small matters because i pray hard everyday dat their sadness will go im contributing plak...haih.

looking forward for weekend!

Friday, October 03, 2008

i can only get a car in FEB?dats looooong!ader x sesaper yg nak sewakan keta pd saya.huhu....

neway, i had a just nice RAYA.not good but ok...when to visit haira irdina in kluang and celebrating with new sister is great.

whats bad about raya dis year is....i cannot celebrate it with my frens.haih....sad
they r all busy with their new family.NO MORE DUIT RAYA FOR ME!obviously....

i love baking n i baked 4 types of cookies for raya.not much but bole la kan..i considered dat as improvements as our cookies only made by N*** all dis years.i know mom is proud of, i sew my own baju raya.

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Eid Mubarak

im no longer HAPPY! my happy sim card is officially terminated..huhu.i forgot to check the expire bad...cemerkap as always.i told a fren dat i'll always remember him as long as i have HAPPY with me.since its gone n he is gone too, i guess its time to let go aite?yes...n i have deleted YOU from my memory.WITH HONOUR!

its a busy day for me wake me up early in the morning to go to tHe market to buy ingredients for our raya menu.guess what?i met - well not actually met, i just saw him at the other side of the road. n i know he saw me too because he look at me with the you-owe-me kind of look.hehe...brings back old memories and its a stupid dat i always wish to forget.

tomorrow is raya n baba treat us Mc'D enjoying every bite of it since the last time i tasted a nice burger was 3 monts ago.HEAVEN!there's only 5 of us dis season..bro is currently at his in law house.celebrating raya with new environment. hope i can cope next year.i'll captured every moment together with my family dis year...



Monday, September 29, 2008


seronoknya kalo ader pendirian..sonoknya kalo tau apa yg kita nak dlm idup..;not dat i donno what i want in life.but im very bad in thinking.i don like choices, options all becoz im bad at making decision.i sumtimes made wrong decision and affected others around me.i remember crying when tickets to kl runs out i donno any other way i can get tears fell down out of panic..i hate dat.i easily experience emotional breakdown - there's a small voice in my head dat never stops telling me how stupid i am, n always reminding me of all my weaknesses instead of making me feel proud of what i do no smart and not beautiful either.sigh....but i know im exist because of stg n dat is becoz ALLAH wants me here... folks are officially closing their stall at Jalan Gudan Ubat.we produce a lot of memories there.i was there since i was 11 and my lil sis was not even in kindergarten.helping them right after school everyday ha leave me to washed my school uniform everyday just to make sure i came to school with my best state. you know how people work at dining or stall...sambal suka nak mercik2 kat baju sekolah yg putih bersih.i fell a lot of time there..tempat jatuh lg dkenang kan.pernah jugak tdo atas meja just to make sure we'r not late for the national day was huge!ramai gile oang...thanx to all your sacrifices mak n baba, we r what we r time for you to take a deep breath live your life at ease.i know u have been though a lot.
its our time now....poor mom, she couldn't let go n cried yesterdayas she was sewing n reminiscing the time from the very moment she started the business..

insyaALLAH....i hope i can perform my duty well as a daughter.i'll make use of this 7 months with you

Sunday, September 28, 2008




i always dream n still hoping i can one teacher dat can inspire my pupils to learn, only because they need to be an A class type of pupils..but because education is the most important thing in life - im not gonna elaborate more on dat.

i just want to share with you guys today about a story i watched dis afternoon on HBO channel called THE FREEDOM WRITERS. dis story is about a teacher name erin (hillary swank).she teach english to a class where the students are stigmatized as failure. the school is facing greatest war of rasisisme n erin - a white teacher is teaching to a multiracial class consist of african american, latino, cambodian and there is only one white boy in her class.she came to class with just to teach but find it hard one when she found out dat almost all her students are involved with gangs.see...they feel secure to walk around their neighbourhood by joining gangs that can protect them.they don really care bout the of the girl is there because her parol officer forced her to go.

despite the fact that all of her students always makes fun of her - she teach english, she keep on trying.she came to the class the next day by using topac to teach poem!n stating dat day, some of her students listened topac a lot.i hope i can do dat!
she starts a writing journal where all student must write in everyday about what they feel.all of them has a different saw with her mother being abused right before her eyes, many of their family is in prison and all of them are prejudice towards white people,some carried gun just to feel safe n saw his friend died from a gun shot.they believe they are in war, to survive.they don need to come to school n they don see whaeducation can do to thme.erin did not receive any support from the school because her students are drop outs who hardly read thus its useless to supply them with book dat they cannot read.she disagree...

she had to work as a salesgirl to collect the money to buy them a book to of the book called DIARY OF ANNE FRANK.a story of a refugees...a story dat is called to their heart.she works at a hotel to collect money to ake them on a field trip.away from violance.what touches me is one boy lost his home and his spirit to learn .but when he thinks about Erin, he knows there is a place that he can called home.he'll be happy when he is in her class.

erin tried everything...bring them to museum, road trip n such just to make sure they have interest to learn. do you know that the education there are based on cluster?all the curiculum n decision that related to the policy of education is in the hand of the principal.n its not easy to make them agree to all her plan.the school doesnt want to spend money for those hopeless teenager.poor thing eh...the stigma and discrimination is awful.integration is still an issue n black people fighting hard for a place in the society.n she published all the journal her students write into a book call the THE FREEDOM WRITERS.

im no good with review but erin touched every heart in dat class n wish i cud do the same.sacrifice everything just to seek for my pupils attention.did i mention her husband left r because he felt left out?well, not dat i want my husband to leave me but i just need my pupils to understand the reason of me standing in front of them everyday, trying hard to make them understand me n enjoy day...i hope i can be dat kind of teacher.teacher who inspire n live my pupils dream.amin....

Friday, September 26, 2008


i started my day with a wonderful smile - well, i try my best to put up that wonderful smile. i have prepare enuff duit raya for my 1S pupils.not to underestimte them but aku budget there will only be 7 pupils dat can answer correctly.keep on reading eh....i'll prove im right.well, the duit raya is only to motivate them since they show no interest to learn at all and exam is coming!

i reach school and still smiling when i remembered the raya card that i wish i can give to my class n 3 additional cards to reply for those yg suka nak pecahkan kaca n gelas.hehe....well, i left them at home.a bit frustrated coz theres always things dat i forgot - may i remind you, today's post will be a bot lengthy.pls bare with me..kuih raya is still coming into bilik guru.haih...sedap jugak kalo dpt beli popia yg comel2 tuh.

ada majlis perpisahan tuk cikgu praktikum..remind me of the memory i had in ayer pa'bas with aesha and all the pupils.i still cherish my first experience of teaching.i tot i was ready back then, but little did i know that it is not easy to work with children.YA ALLAH, I NEED PATIENCE TO PERSUE MY PASSION IN HIS JOURNEY.i cannot let myself rasa penat sgt.whats more bila pikir i still need 2 wait for 2 months for my gaji.2 looooong months.imagine, skang baru end of september.lama betul!dgn kering kontang ni...i hate asking people for money mcm mintak belas kasihan n simpati apatah lg menembah senarai utang!dh 4 bulan xmkn fastfood nih.coklat pon xmampu nak beli..

anyhow...thanx to sk ayer pa'abas for all your support.

then...majlis dteruskan dgn acara memberi duit raya pd murid.i really tot d money is from d school, rupanya cikgu tu personally nak bg and she gives it to ALL pupils.murah rezeki cikgu tu kan.sonok je tgk bebudak beratur, salam for d duit raya.FYI - cikgu tu pakai tudung pink dalam gambar.

its 1110...time for my class with ready with duit raya and the pupils were called one by i tot....hanya 6 oang saja dpt spell it right!haih..2 minggu, ari2 ulang sunday sampai saturday.xpela...budak2 kan.they are never serious.

i reached home, feeling restless gile, gastric n xleh nak i was watching tv while thinking what kind of teacher i'll be, OPRAH said, one person at a time, that is how we can change the world.yes, maybe if can change myself to be more positive towards the kids, then i can change them. there's one scene that really touch.there were 64% of high school students felt left out becuse of their size, shape n colours.i cried...realizing how i live my life for the past 15 years when i started gaining weight.

as i was crying, in tense of my physical being...received a msg from a fren saying tht she has receive her salary.haih....down!giler!dats when i decided to sleep n not doing anything except watching tv waiting for buka time.i ignored my mother until now and all her nagging. im actually used to it.

tried to sms my fiance...XDER KEDIT PLAK!SENGAL!

blast from the past

ithis is just a test bcoz its look like im stuck on 12 SEPTEMBER 2008! moving on.its written on d particular post

i need to continue my journey!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

in RAYA mood

bilik guru is empty due to renovation. malangnya...suma brg dihumban ke kelas aku..huhu.when i came in to teach, all the pupils are not paying attention.maybe sbb byk buku n dah mcm rasa malas nak blajo ah tuh. cecikgu pon dah semangat nak bercuti.walopon kuiz kemerdekaan sedang berlangsung, ironinya ia diringi ngan lagu raya.CELEBRATION!!!

emm...aktiviti masa lapang di bilik guru yg lapang - salain resipi kuih raya dr majalah kak binah.she's cool!selama ni xpenah amik kesempatan bbual ngan seniors kan.maybe because she is in her late 20 thus more like my big sis at home.bila nak buat kuih?next week kot...since im d one left at home.selama ni bila balik dah berbalang kuih siap.a lot of thing is happening, spirit of fasting is fading in our house - sunyi waktu berbuka n bersahur - so...we have to keep THE RAYA spirit strong!lets forget the black sheep.HATE HER!!!

i overheard my parents talking yesterday.they tot i was sleeping...actually,i don. they decided to quit working - no more meniaga for sis said we can support them.yes...its about time rite.they have been through a lot.before we came to segamat..baba did more than one job.never had the chance to meet him.woke up to school, baba is sleeping...when its our sleeping time,baba isn't home since im staying with them...they don have to worry about the bills,groceries n all.yes...i don mind.but...funny thing is..baba is checking through catalogue for new freezer.hehe...saba eh baba.i'll get u a new one before raya.insyaALLAH...

Friday, September 12, 2008


im losing my teeth!no!im soooo not ready to let it go...dramatic giler kan.sedramatic drama citer hantu yg sedang ditonton.

hari ni sempat buat kuih bahulu...well, just helping mk to fulfill her wishes.suma mak buat kuih waiting for my sis to come home then baru kitaong gerak gempur wat kuih2 oang2 muda nih.hehe...

nothing new in life...nak beli kad raya tuk anak murid pon kena mintak sponsor.I NEED MONEY!today, as i was teaching - alone - as always kalo masuk 1S...i made a silly announcement.heregoes..ESOK, SAPER YG BLEH EJAKAN SUNDAY SAMPAI SATURDAY PD TEACHER, DPT DUIT RAYA.
hei...suddenly i got reaction from the pupils.CIKGU NAK BAGI BAPER? as i was contemplating, i said 50 sen jer. n i heard replies...i repeat REPLIES YER!
ALA, 50 SEN JER.ha...i will not surrender to dis ind of kids eh. KALO AWK XNAK..CIKGU PON XNAK BAGI!HA...SAMBUNG SALIN!

n today, my pupils change my favret poem into javanese version!haha...haih.lotih botul.

well...dats my day today.dada....

Happy Eid Mubarak

Dapatkan Satu Di Sini - e-comment2u


2 months of teaching...felt sooooo tired bcoz i could not entertain myself.nothing is more precious than sleeping since xder duit nak treat myself.whats worst is probs dat keep coming that regards to MONEY!

i hate xkisah kalo ader oang nak pinjam duit - whenever i have the money,mesti sayer tlg tp skang ni oang yg suka nak pinjam duit oang tanpa kebenaran atau nama lain nyer MENCURI!isu duit sgt sensitif sampai ko boleh putus kwn.mcm mana xde duit sekali pon i would never steal from a friend apatah lg bila boleh memburuk kan nama kita - coz it involve third party.

im babling here sbb xpuas hati ngan hamba Allah sorang probs pop ups everyday...n dis is the worst for the week!


we are all in a journey
to find the perfect colour
to find the joy and happiness
and sumone to turn to
to go through the spinning wheel of life
to all my bestest bud - u know who u r - n my loves one…i love u guys and zillion of hug and kissess goes to u guys for making my life as it is today…..A COMPLETE WHOLE!


mak is sleeping beside me rite now....poor her.but she smiled during breakfast.n thanx to kak sue.really hope she can keep the smile

altough i barely shows how much i love you,pls believe me dat i do.i still don have the guts to tell u guys upfront how much i love d othman's.well...dats now how i raised.i know you both have been through a lot and insyaALLAH, i'll make use of the time left for me to be with you both.

whenever baba pick me up at school, rasa cam balik masa sekolah.bezanya....he never pick me up from school before.naik tooks longer than a car ride tp i cherish the talk while on road.i can't hear u most of the time pn...hehe.

i can only pray dat all your burden will be lighten cause me too is waiting for the end of it.pls hang on...pls..pls.NO MORE TEARS PLS..PLS...I NEED UR STRENGTH TO CONTINUE MY JOURNEY TO!

teacher....educating people not a brand (like my pupils tot dat mohan is a food) today i remembered the day i went for interview - that is about 6 years back.i told the interviewer the reason y i choose to be a teacher is because im looking forward for the challenge but i honestly said dat i wanted and hope and pray dat i can teach secondary students because im not good with children.not dat i don love them but i just donno how to deal with them...i broke down easily when they don listen to me and dat just made me feel SO ANGRY and i end up babling, giving them a bad side of teacher and arouse the hatred in them.

i tried to be be patient esp during this fasting month but they don get me!y??can't they stay put and listen and just do their work as told?y can't they do just that?one of my uncle is a secondary teacher..and he found out im teaching in primary school he just said how lucky am i.its is not as hard as those in secondary.well....i admit,my pupils don have discipline problem but i hate myself when im came home from school feeling so tired because 3 of my pupils cried when i ask them to stand outside the class when they giving me the same excuses...CIKGU!SAYER XBAWAK BUKU!dengan gaya sleepy - mata kuyu - tangan dan kepala atas meja.haih...what should i do?

i wish i can be a good teacher.its breaking my heart when one boy from my class said he hates me and he will sepak and lempang me whenever he have the chance.i just told him dat i'll make sure he hates for his entire i doin it right?ntah...they are very week in class...dahla lemah,suka bermain plak.if there no improvement,the seniors will blame me.they were left with no teachers for the last 4 months n there is nothing i could do to improve - sort of.

the tension increase bila budak dajah 3 from my class spell donkey with DONGKI.what will happen when they goes to year 4?suma budak level one are under my responsibility.

Thursday, September 11, 2008


ingatkan dapat la rehat bila bebudak xsekolah...emm,this is not actually a complaint but i really hate prosedures.especially when there are too many of them.ari selasa,telah menyusahkan baba untuk ke melaka utk uruskan elaun praktikal (demi untuk tidak membayar 3rat especially when you still have 120 left),maka aku tebalkan muka dok dlm keta tanpa mengeluarkan duit minyak walo father understands my situation.luv u baba!mmuahxs..

hari rabu...we receive a notice on preparing exams questions.i have to prepare questions for all level one pupils.baik...dats our job aku blur bila mana mereka kata,cikgu2 sek ni suka potostat je.senang...sek ni pyh skit kalo nak razo -hope i spell it right.baik...mana nak carik duit pototat sebyk 100 over pupils?bukan sehelai tau ketas soklan.they said not all of us can claim the money back..hei,dat doesnt sound right kan.mala nak pk dulu.kna settle the questions first.

back to formality and procedures....OFFER LETTER!its precious..we have to get it done by thursday - dat is today.kalo x..gaji bulan 3.tgh la busy confuse dgn sifat dr sendiri yg agak lemban when it comes to procedures and formality...akak kerani bleh plak kaik gempak tanya aku mana awk punya sijil?kalo xder sayer xleh process.awk dah konvo kan?....aku jwp ah sudah(hari konvo bukan la kenangan terindah aku)...dia plak reply,awk mohon pakai ijazah ke apa?..aku blur.kan dier tau aku amik B.ED.mestila degree tukan..aku pon jawab..a'ah,pakai degree..ha?degree?abih tu asal sini tulis ijazah?
weh?!xsama ke...aku malas nak lyn sbb migrain pk bila plak aku nak amik cert aku tuh.haih...
dtg arini..rupanya bleh jer kalo guna result.untuk tidak menghampakan puan kerani,aku tpaksa mintak tlg gg to collect it for is a gamble kan.full of drama.thanx gg...thats what frens are for kan.hehe...

im at to sleepy.siap tersengguk masa baca yasin.kasik alasan nak pg toilet pas abih baca yasin.huhuu...tgh carik soalan, taip nama pupils(which i should have done ages ago)..isi plak borang temuduga online.hmm...mmg rumit.hanya untuk sahkan jawatan sebagai GURU!
pas abih panitia yang karat n berhabuk tu plak nak duruskan.nak wat apa ngan fail kosong tuh?!no idea..

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

total FELICITY!!!

today...i go to school by car(mcm ayat dak dajah 3 kan).xper...yg penting, i don have to ride the bike for today.HAPPY!!! when i reach school..the surrounding is so quiet, as if its the school holiday but we have to come to give extra classes.well..maybe its bcoz the level one pupils is not around..HAPPY!!! since i teach only level one pupils.sgt free sampai ngantuk browsing through the net.browse and browse and browse and ooppsss...its 1 o'clock.i need to move..gone to melaka to sttling things regarding elaun praktikal yg tertangguh.

hope can get everything settle for the day...ah!lupa plak satu point penting.i got one good news.offer letter dah sampai.meaning to say...salary will be in soon!HAPPY! so happy that i smile when i sleep in the car.i only got nervous when i reach maktab when mr.segaran said he can't recall me (as expected)....luckily, he is a systematic and dedicated worker..maka terjumpa lah borang kehadiran ku.alhamdulillah....bila jumpa pn.fatimah, she was very soft spoken.langsung xsama mcm dalam fon.she sound sombong mcm pekerja maktab yg lain.well...dis a gud news to Aesha n me,in less than one hour everything is more worries about having to pay the 300!!!

cuma pelik ttg satu perkara.if its true bout what i heard from shark...she receive 2 months or one months ke xsure, elaun praktikal sbb satu form xder tandatangan.but we gave 2 months of our attendance sheet and we did not received a penny.y is dat?emmm..... is GREAT AND AWESOME!!!!
its all about the money...

Monday, September 08, 2008

i love holidays!

im looking forward for tomorrow...yay!all level 1 pupils will be on hols since the UPSR is starting tomorrow.walopon kena dtg ke sekolah juga...i could rest from doing the ABM and RPH.i could rest from dealing with children who can't stop talking and chasing each other.i could rest from getting angry ang hot tempered everytime i marked their books...yay! things that bothered me is just the fact that i had to ride to school.not that i MUST go to school by car...but i prefer to bawak moto sendiri rather than duduk kat belakang.i love the early breeze is so soothing and it makes me smile all the way to school.

school is better used to the environment.ikut cara Mdm.Khaliah,finish your class for the day, sit at your own table and do your work.get involve in a conversation only when you need to.tomorrow, im gonna beautify my class so we can win the prize..hehe.well...just to show that im not that lazy not to care bout my class.harapan tuk menang maybe zero to none sbb kelas yg berkongsi dgn bilik ABM mungkin dah sedia sesak.nothing much that i can do..

im more stable dis week...kesan air klorox dah abis.hehe..dah xsakit perut or pening2 lalat kerana being so cemerkap.


Sunday, September 07, 2008


xsalah kan kalo kita ader skit rasa envy dalam hati?huhu...if only i could turn back time,i choose to fix my AUGUST!


dedicate dis post to the newly weds....


ain & mus


anne & faiz

ewan & sue

shaz & fendi